Sentimental Valium

Now playing: Damien Rice "Delicate"

Fun day so far. Got up really early and went to the laundry mat. My feelings of being there are mixed. It's a hassle to carve out 2 hours to do laundry outside of the house, but I really enjoy the "interaction" with people. Well... I guess it's more accurately people WATCHING and less actual interacting. And there is just something therapeutic for me about freshly washed and folded clothes.

I have a bizarre and unusual (for males) love for shoe shopping! I found a pair today I love. Actually an Italian shoe maker that I bought in Europe a few years ago. I found some for cheap today, so.... Girls you know what I'm talking about right??!?? But here is my question: Who is the person that gets paid to tie shoes? I don't think I have EVER seen shoes tied correctly when I go shopping for them! It always takes 5 minutes to figure out how to untie the shoes and then fix them! Is that just a conspiracy to keep you inside stores longer? Some kind of bizarre partnership between shoe makers and stores??

I always complain whenever it's cloudy. The past couple minutes though I have been transfixed by the beauty of the clouds today! It blows my mind to watch them move across the sky at different speeds and intervals; to see sunlight break through some and be enveloped in others; to play the childhood (not childISH) game of "What does that cloud look like?"

Makes me wonder how many other things in my life get ignored by me. How many over-looked things are all around me that I should discover?

Any suggestions?

posted by -tr0y- @ 1:34 PM

Weird morning. Woke up and didn't need to head to work...... Strange feeling!

Filter's "Hey Man Nice Shot" just came on.... (prepare for a full countdown of music that plays as I write today.)

Did anyone happen to hear about the guy in Florida attempting to play what he called a "practical joke" on his girlfriend...using a homemade bomb?!?! No joke. This guy rigged up some kind of uber-powerful firework attached to some kind of rocket that he planned to shoot towards his girlfriend (now ex?!?!?) as he drove past her in his car. He just hoped he would surprise her. Turns out, he got the surprise. It didn't make it out of the car. Somehow, the rocket ended up getting caught as it was heading out the window... and found its way into the guy's CROTCH!!!!! He suffered some pretty major burns and evidently his feet have imprints of his sandals outlined in them. I consider myself a pretty compassionate person, but I cannot muster up an OUNCE of pity for this guy.

(Versus' "Eskimo" is playing now)

Hap-Hap-Happy Birthday to Dana Carvey who turns 49 today. EASILY one of my all-time favorite SNL cast. Rather than attack the current state of SNL, I am just going to commit to watching "Wayne's World" in the next couple of weeks.

Also to Marvin Gaye, who would have turned 65 today, except for a terrible encounter with his father. He died on April 1st of 1984, one day before his birthday. His life story is a sordid one. I have said it a billion times and will say it at least 2 billion more: "Let's Get It On" is one of the best recordings EVER!! (And thanks to John Cusak and "High Fidelity" for bringing that song back into the public's attention and earshot!)

(Now listening to "Pretty Boy" by Tiger Trap.... mellow day today for me and the "shuffle" selection on my mp3 payer is bringing the GOODS!!)

I ran across something yesterday that made me laugh OUT LOUD in the middle of the 'green and white coffee place.' Their entire website is creative and entertaining, but the Van Gogh-Goghs' site has a piece called "How To Suck At Basketball" that is outstanding!!! If you want to laugh (and be reminded of "The Cable Guy") check out that link. And pass it along to anyone you know who takes leisurely games of ANYTHING athletic way too seriously.

Gonna eat and try to enjoy the sunshine and last few days in Chicago.

("Is A Woman" by Lambchop ushers me out of this blogging episode... hauntingly appropriate I'm afraid!)

posted by -tr0y- @ 11:18 AM

I cried today.

I know that might make me sound like every other stereotypical insensitive male, highlighting an episode of crying. But those who know me would (hopefully) attest to the fact that I am NOT insensitive (not 100% of the time anyway). But it has been a while since I have cried--at least cried like today. I've teared up during movies or because of songs or cuz of getting up WAY too early in the morning. But today was different. I cried because my brother and sister-in-law had their first baby. Well... babIES! Twin girls. Jamie Lynn and Danielle Marie. I cried because I am so incredibly happy for them. I cried because my entire family was standing together outside the nursery, looking at the girls.... and I wasn't there. I cried because this signals a major transition in my family, especially concerning my mom and sister. I cried, probably, because I really needed to. And I want to cry more.

Isn't it strange that crying, something that happens most often because of bad things, almost always makes you feel better? And is it strange to sometimes actually WANT to cry? Of course, those are the times when I couldn't muster up a single bit of moisture if I were to slam my hand in the door a couple hundred times! Sometimes though, like today, crying is a lonely experience. A lot of times, I want to be completely alone for a good cry. But today, I really wanted nothing more than a warm body somewhere close by....The body didn't need to say anything or be consoling...Just THERE! The realization that I was alone probably made me cry just a little more. (Guess my crying episode today wasn't entirely self-less.....)

I got cut off today by a man in a maroon Cutlass. He gave ME a long angry look and then the finger. As he was pulling in front of me violently, I noticed a lone bumper sticker: Character Counts. mmm hmmm....

In the works: Cait and I might be joining forces to redesign the look of this abysmal blog.

I noticed today that I always put my right shoe on first. And I always brush the lower right side of my teeth longer than any other place in my mouth.

I'm feeling extremely scattered today....

Few things make me happier than hearing a little kid laugh. It's amazing how lost they get in whatever they are laughing at. It might be even more amazing how lost I get in their laughter. I seem to lose track of everything else for those couple seconds. I want to live more of my life as though I am surrounded by little kid laughter.

I want to laugh more.

I want to cry more too.

As of today, Thursday afternoon at 4:53pm, until Tuesday morning at 9am, I don't have a job. It feels amazing and free.

I want to be a good friend. To anyone that hasn't experienced my friendship as a good thing, I am really really sorry. To anyone I haven't met yet, know that I really want to do a good job at being your friend. To everyone else, help me be as good a friend as I can be.

How many of you are sick and tired of the nostalgic tr0y?
Shalom....

posted by -tr0y- @ 4:24 PM

Up and down day. Seems all too common these days I'm afraid... The whole moving process is bringing up new dynamics to deal with. The transporting all my belongings definitely does suck. But the saying "good-bye" aspect is by far worse! There is this realization that I won't be seeing a few people before I leave. That's harder to grasp than I thought. I'm coming to grips with how naive I have been about this entire moving experience. Finding a place in MI, leaving a job and people, making new friends/"easing" into existing relationships... I'm feeling less my age and more like I'm in middle school again, just entering a new school and a new 'stage' of life. (Though I still consider myself largely pre-pubescent, but that's for another post....)

Guess I'm not being honest enough about what is really going on. This is hard and I'm scared. There.... I said it!

(Switching gears and subjects--consider this a warning so some type of reading and/or mental whiplash doesn't happen!)

Is anyone else amused and slightly bothered by the "Almost Apology"? It happened to me today two times. The same person apologized to me two separate times today. Both times, I was confused and asked "Ummm, ok, but what for?!" She then proceeded to tell me she ALMOST did something and was apologizing for what she almost did. She almost bumped into me once and then almost called me someone else's name. Initially, I didn't think much of it, other than, "OK, she's simply overly-nice." (Something we meloncholics think more often than we care to admit!!) But as I thought about it more, I realized how much I was thinking about something THAT NEVER HAPPENED!!! What is that about? Doesn't this girl realize how much is going on in the world that occupies our thoughts? Like I need one more thing to think about--let alone something that ALMOST happened!!!! I've come to realize that she isn't nice at all. Not unlike the media, she is filling my mind with inconsequential junk, robbing the real important things of the time they deserve and need.

Now she's robbed good blog space also. grrrrrrrrr

Besides feeling quasi-depressed and frustrated today, I am feeling better thanks to something musical. (And some very nice comments from Liz!!) If you haven't heard of The Incredible Moses Leroy then you are missing out on a sonic treat! It's experimental, but accessible. It's artistic, but not "out there." (Many a friend consider most of the music I listen to as 'out there'.) It has a R&B angle, but has a vibe and feel that doesn't fit into a category that I know. Reason it has impacted me today: it's fun! The songs "Fuzzy" and "Beep Beep Love" give a good picture of IML. (You can download two mp3s here.)

And more thing about music: EVERYONE SHOULD LISTEN TO MORE THAN WHAT IS PLAYED ON THE RADIO!!

Quick thoughts:
:: SimTroy has proposed and been turned down COUNTLESS times by Bella. He hates paying bills and seems to be increasingly unhappy going to work. (Strange how "art" does imitate life, huh?)
:: I desperately want a new design for my blog. Worried that might mean a new "host" and address....
:: I don't miss having a television very much.
:: I'm thinking about trying to live my life with the minimum amount of clothes possible. Wondering what that would look like with my 'thrift store line.'

More later... think I'm heading for some "comfort food:" SUSHI!! (Don't worry Cait--I'll have some unagi for you!)

posted by -tr0y- @ 2:56 PM

New blog 'friend': Liz (etch).
I've laughed a TON reading her site the past week or so. Artisitic and individual.... and, like Cait, is into GOOD music. Check her site out (link available on right also).

posted by -tr0y- @ 12:36 PM

Thanks to a conversation the other night with fellow blogger Cait, I have plunged back into the world of The Sims!! Last night, I started all over by creating TroySim, a bald artist looking for the perfect femaleSim. Just a few updates on the life of TroySim:
>> I got a great job as a mascot for a minor league baseball team and have already succeeded to gain two promotions, bringing my paycheck up to 230 Simdollars a day!
>> I successfully set my entire kitchen on fire, thanks to my inability to cook. I lost two counters and a stove. In my panicking state, I installed multiple high-powered smoke detectors. To this point though, TroySim has been too depressed to study cooking to improve and cut down on the inside flames.
>> My friend, Mortimer Goth, continually stops by, uninvited I might add, for a swim in my new pool. I'm not sure if I most bothered by his showing up unannounced or by his PINK SPEEDO!!!
>> I had to hire a gardender, at $10 an hour, to take care of my foilage scattered around the house and pool. I'm not happy about it, but it's a good thing TroySim is relatively neat so I don't need to invest that money into a maid!
>> Lastly, I have made great strides in my relationship with Bella Goth (not sure if she and Morty are related...). I have passed by the acquaintance stage to "family friends" and hope to soon seek out a hug opportunity!!

Plenty more TroySim news to come, as I am sure you are waiting with bated breath...

My good friend Naiv Assilem is heading to a special event tonight: the Meet Market. Have you heard of these things? It's a gathering of single people, all between the ages 24-30ish, coming together to find a potential relationship. Everyone is given what amounts to a scorecard and 3 minutes with each member of the opposite gender. In those 3 mintues, you are allowed to ask anything to help you gain an opinion about this person and make a decision whether you would like to persue something else.

As crazy as the whole thing sounds, I have REALLY wanted to try this. I was helping her today come up with some questions that would push the getting-to-know-you idea a step farther. Please feel free to chime in on these questions, or provide any additional questions for my friend. (I'll give post-Meet Market details on Thursday after I see her again!)

>> You have all dominion over time and space. What actual person (no fictional characters allowed) would you want to get in a fist fight with?
>> If you could be a disease, ANY disease, what would you be?
>> Greater human tragedy: boy bands or endangered animals?

posted by -tr0y- @ 10:03 AM

Is anyone else growing increasingly uncomfortable with "new discoveries?" I'm not wanting to sound Amish or anything; like I'm not all for technology and learning new things to improve society/quality of life/etc.... It's more to do with the new discoveries being made that end up obliterating what I have always been told was or held to be true.
Here is the newest one. The Centers for Disease Control have research (whatever that means!!!) that stretching does not help you avoid injuries from sports and exercise after all. Now, this doesn't end up causing me a lot of heartache or worry. I have hated to stretch since earliest involvements in sports. What does bother me though is how seemingly easy it is to take back what is ingrained in the cultural brain. I have noticed this trend for a long time now and was really struck by it today!! (Along with the discovery that St. John's Wort doesn't do anything. So much for my favorite named supplement!!)

One other random news thought. There is evidently a man in Vermont who has a large collection of.... goats!! His Buddhist religious views prohibit him from slaughtering any of them. He evidently shares his house with about 70 of them. The AP article describes his house as "a mix of goat droppings and hay." This is officially the last time I complain about any of my friends' houses when I visit!!
But the part of this story I found most intriguing is the heading CNN chose for its online page. Concerning this 63 year-old man, who lives with 300 goats, this is the heading given:

"Vermont Probes Man With 70 Goats in House."

I could be wrong (on MULTIPLE levels probably), but I am not sure if using the verb PROBE in connection with a guy and his houseful of goats is the most innocent example of journalism I have ever seen!

posted by -tr0y- @ 2:47 PM