Sentimental Valium

Now playing: "Andy You're A Star" by The Killers.

Two posts in one week!!!
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Well the anticipated (?) Christmas album has been pushed back a week. We're having some problems with the illustrations and design work. What we have right now is awesome--it's going to look incredible!! We can't rush it though so we'll need to wait an extra 7 days for the record. I'll keep people posted and keep checking the website (www.musicatmars.com) for more info.

So I was in the bank the other day and found out a couple of things. Interestingly, neither one thrilled me. First off, it looks like someone has tried to use my social security number. Somebody outside of Indianapolis tried to open a bank account using my number, but was denied. I had this weird feeling when the teller told me. THEN he said, "So either someone is using your number or you are using someone's number" and gives me this look from under his bushy eyebrows. I know it's probably his job, but I was pissed. I'm going to run a credit check just to be safe and try to figure this out.

After I found that out, someone stopped me in the bank lobby that I met a couple months ago. He's a nice guy--gifted drummer who is studying to teach music at a local community college. He was in there with his new wife opening an account or something. He said this to me: "Yea I thought that was you when we walked in. I could tell by how you squint and no one can see your eyes when you smile." HUH!?!? Is this true?!?! I didn't know how to take it! I'm not sure if that's something that should bother me or if it's just a fact that I need to learn to accept. I had no idea... Is that naive? Do I need to spend more time examining my face in the morning? (Or maybe just have my eyes open in the morning?!)

Needless to say, that wasn't one of my better trips to the bank.

And then I looked at my account balance.....

It will be a while before I go back there!

Exit music: "Caring Is Creepy" by The Shins.

posted by -tr0y- @ 4:18 PM

Do you ever have this dream: you're running as fast and hard as you can and you suddenly fall and can't figure out how to get up? Once you do finally figure out how to get to your feet again, you stumble and find the ground again after a few steps. It's one of those really frustrating dreams that somehow still bugs me after I'm awake. It's like there is something in that dream that I know, instinctively, is accurate about my life in some way.

I've not been able to wake up from that dream for the past 3 or 4 weeks. I've been living the dream--trying my best to get back on my feet and keep running as hard as I can towards something, but struggling to do so. I feel out of breath--out of energy and desire. Until the past three days or so, I've felt really lethargic and indifferent about a lot of life. I think I'm starting to round the corner though...

And, contrary to c@it's usually reliable reporting, I am NOT dead... Though I guess that all depends on your definition of death... Maybe I have been.

I will say, though, that there isn't a need to worry about my being depressed or suicidal or anything. I'm actually pretty happy for being so worn out. Things here in GRap have been positive. Quite a few things to report on--though it might not seem sufficient for my recent absence. All the same....

We have finished our website and first two recordings. I'm really excited about it and feel really proud to be a part of something this big. The amount of traffic on the site and downloads of our songs have been encouraging. If you are interested in helping "support" an aspiring songwriter, you can download the recording of "Matchless" on our site and contribute 8 cents to my pocket. (That's the going rate for royalties to songwriters these days.... That's why I'm rolling in it!!) If you don't want to pay, you can still catch a glimpse of the song thanks to a 30 second clip on the site. Either way, that's one of the reasons I've had an extended hiatus.

The other main reason has been another recording project. This one has been really consuming my life! We are working on a Christmas record to benefit underprivileged children in West Michigan. It's an exciting project--100% of the money made will go to an urban scholarship program that will sponsor children so they can attend camp. It's amazing to think that many children live within an hour of Lake Michigan and have NEVER SEEN IT! This will hopefully give them a chance to escape their crummy neighborhoods for two weeks and experience life in a new way. Our hope is raise $50,000 for these children. So I'm spear-heading this recording project. There will be 12 tracks on the record--2 originals and 10 new versions of familiar Christmas songs. The project, titled "...to the world" will be available on-line and at Mars on November 12th. It's been really fun but really demanding. Just tonight I dropped off the last two songs to be mixed. Thursday we will be in the studio again to do the mastering and then it's mailed Friday to be duplicated. Such an exciting time. I'll be giving more details I'm sure--I'll be unashamedly pushing it. I want to do whatever little part I can to help change the lives of as many children here as possible. (And because I think the project will be REALLY good.)

Both of these investments of my time have been in addition to work, which continues to be really positive. I've had lots of thoughts lately about work and what I'm good at and passionate about, but I'm not quite ready to unload those here. I'm still deeply processing all of that and need some more time to let it bounce around in my brain.

I'm still bald.

I am now officially a Michigan resident--I have received both my Michigan driver's license and license plates. It was strange to take the Illinois plates off the good ole Saturn. A couple of times I have almost walked past my car because I still look for Illinois plates in parking lots.

I'm not bright. Still.

I also still don't have the internet at my place. Things there continue to be mediocre. There have been bizarre occurances and a few things needing repairs, in addition to those that have never been taken care of before. The list of "need-to-do's" grows weekly. We'll see what happens first. I can't complain all that much though--the guy who owns the building has been really flexible with me about some money issues, so.... Anyway, the wireless issues at the house make it increasingly difficult to post regularly. To avoid another "Troy Is Dead" scare, I'll do my absolute best to be more regular.

I've still not figured out how to take care of the links I lost before--I've also struggled to add the counter back on the page. I'm not sure what else is wrong with the page so I'll need people to tell me if there are things that need to be taken care of. If they are major issues, I'll try and bribe my "web-mistress" c@it and see if she wouldn't mind being an assistant.

I'm recently listening to only a few artists on the iPod--I go through seasons where I am sort of "obsessed" with a couple records.
1. The Magnetic Fields "i"
2. The Wrens "The Meadowlands"
3. Caviar "The Thin Mercury Sound"
4. The Garden State Soundtrack

I've not been watching a lot of movies--mostly just seeing movies that I love again. Though I did see "Mean Girls" and was entertained. I've not been all that in touch with pop culture these days--just one more area of my life that has "suffered" because of my schedule.

You would think, after all this time, I would have so many things to write about--but I'm S-T-Ruggling. Life hasn't been that interesting. I'm still debating getting a dog, though the way my schedule has been, I've been advised against it for now. Being away from my house for 15+ hours a day probably doesn't provide the best environment for a puppy.

I've scheduled a vacation for myself--though I'm not exactly sure where I'll go or what I'll do. I have a couple weeks to take before the end of the year--I'd love to head somewhere warm for a few days. I might head to South Carolina and spend a few days with my dad--it HAS to be nicer there right?! I just don't have much available to spend on a trip--otherwise I'd do something significant.

To close, I was sent this news article today and I wanted to share it with everyone--that's just the kind of guy I am!!

Police Say Woman Stabbed Husband's Penis
PHNOM PENH, Cambodia (AP) - A Cambodian woman stabbed her husband's penis with a knife during an argument in which she accused him of being a violent drunk, police said Monday.
Tuy Narin, 35, attacked 37-year-old Chhun Saran earlier this month in Kandal province near the capital Phnom Penh, said Mang Penh, a local police officer.
Tuy Narin called her husband a drunkard, prompting him to retaliate by throwing a sandal at her, Mang Penh said. Tuy Narin's mother and two sisters then wrestled the outnumbered husband to the floor and his angry wife stabbed him with a knife, the police officer said.
The victim, who appeared to have been drinking, required seven stitches at a local hospital but the injury was ``not life-threatening,'' he added.
Chhun Saran withdrew a complaint against his wife after relatives intervened and urged the couple to reconcile, Mang Penh said.

That is by far the scariest and saddest story I have ever heard! Note to self--never throw a sandal at a woman. NEVER!!!!

posted by -tr0y- @ 6:41 PM